By the time we feel burned out, we’ve already pushed ourselves too far. And now we’re forced to do something about it. The problem is, what can we do? We’re in this place because we honestly believe that it was the only way to get everything done. We wouldn’t have done this to ourselves if there were options, now would we? No. Life is just hard and digging in to get the work done…no matter the cost…was the only way.
Does this sound familiar? Or perhaps you tell yourself a different story. But regardless of what that is, the end result is the same: You have burned the candle at both ends and now you desperately need a break.
But how do you just take a break? You are the one holding up all of the spinning plates! If you walk away, a disaster is definitely going to happen.
And maybe you’re right. But you can’t continue down this path and expect it to get better.
Burnout is a blaring signal that something needs to change.
Now some people wait for their boss, or colleagues or company to step in. But no one really knows how you are feeling, except for you. Because of that fact, I believe that it is up to you to call it. To lay down the gauntlet and acknowledge how you feel. To get real about your physical, mental and emotional state. And to make a plan to get back to a normal and balanced way of living.
Normal? My bet is you probably don’t remember what that even looks like right about now.
When you are feeling overwhelmed daily, and stress has become a blanket of familiarity, your eyes burn by the end of each day, your exercise regimen has completely disappeared, and your social life is empty, it’s time to make some changes.
No one plans to get burned out.
But slowly, your work starts eating into your personal time, your family time, and your hobbies. Oh so slowly….when you didn’t even realize it….your work is your entire existence. Or worse….your workload is expanding while you are still trying to juggle kids, a partner, hobbies, and neighborhood and school events.
It’s just too much.
So what do you do now? You know something needs to change, but this has been going on for so long, you have no idea how to get back.
Creating change in life requires us to understand why we chose this path in the first place. It typically begins with a belief. “I’m not good enough.” “I need to prove myself.” “When I show up and work more, people will see me and respect me.”
Or a million other beliefs that take you down the pathway to burnout.
Our beliefs are what drive our choices. And how we feel about ourselves adds another layer to our belief system.
So to fix burnout for yourself once and for all, we need to look within ourselves. To uncover our beliefs. To see exactly what got us to this point. Without doing that, you are just putting a bandaid on the problem. And eventually, you’ll go back to being burned out. Since we don’t want that, let’s talk about what you can do to get out of the burnout cycle.
In my upcoming book with Jack Canfield called Mindset Matters, I talk about the importance of mindset. And I define mindset as the combination of our beliefs and our perceptions. Understanding our beliefs is key to understanding why we do what we do. And understanding our perceptions uncovers the filter with which we see life. So investigating your personal mindset is the first step to stopping burnout today and in your future.
Connected to this, is the concept of Boundaries. Each of us set personal boundaries in our lives, even if we aren’t aware of them. These boundaries were taught to us through lessons, observations and trial & error. Our boundaries set the time we start and stop work. They determine how people speak to you and who you hang out with. They guide you in what you believe is appropriate or not.
Boundaries are what keep you sane. And they are important to set, especially when dealing with burnout.
But boundaries are directly connected to how we feel about ourselves. If we genuinely love who we are, we will have strong boundaries throughout all facets of our life. But if we really struggle with liking the person we are, our boundaries will be flimsy at best.
So at the core, Loving Who You Are is the goal. And it is the answer you are seeking to rid yourself of feeling burned out.
Sounds so simple, doesn’t it?
But this pattern of overwork didn’t just happen overnight. It was created by small choices over a long period of time. And changing those habits can be hard. But hear me on this:
When you consciously make the choice to love who you are right now….exactly as you are…you are taking the step to improve your entire life. Every. Single. Part. Of. It.
Loving yourself means no more negative self-talk. No more looking in the mirror in disgust. It means making life choices that serve you, not harm you. It means spending time with people that love you, that see you, that hear you and value your worth, your opinion, and your well-being. It means using your gifts to help others. It means using compassion and empathy when communicating with others in the world. It means living the golden rule: treating others as you would like to be treated. It means living your life with pure joy and enjoying the journey of your life.
Showing up for things in your life like work, your family, friends, community are all important. Doing a good job is important. Caring about what and how you’re doing it, is important. But make sure you put down the boundary line so you can create Balance for yourself.
Tonight or this weekend, make time for You. Take yourself out. Do something fun. Reconnect with your heart, your head, and your soul. Remind yourself why you are a good person….one that is lovable beyond measure. And take that with you each day as you take the next step forward.
You can Emerge Positive.
Positively,
Deanne
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