“To be happy at home is the ultimate result of all ambition.” Samuel Johnson
It was several years ago when I first encountered this quote and it stopped me in my tracks. I questioned it. I wasn’t bought in at first. But my mind wouldn’t let it go.
I’m getting up at 4:30am every morning to be happy at home?
I’m working my tail off at the office to be happy at home?
I’m going to the gym each day to be happy at home?
I’m trying to save money to be happy at home?
I’m looking for my life partner to be happy at home?
Hmmm. Maybe he’s right.
Each week, I go through a process to figure out what to write about for the Emerge Positive newsletter. This week, the quote popped up again.
But this time, I decided to re-frame the question.
What exactly are we looking for in life? I mean, what is missing that would make you feel better? Be happy? Feel content?
I’ve moved a lot in my adult life. And when asked about it, I always say that as long as you have money coming in and a roof over your head, you can live basically anywhere.
But is that enough?
Surely we are looking for more than a job and a rooftop?
And yes, I think most of us are.
So we are striving for something. We work hard, we play hard, we save money, we spend money, we try to take care of our overall well-being, we look for love and break up, and we eat (or drink) sugar to chill out.
So are you happy at home? Am I?
When I think about my home, yes, it involves a roof, but it is so much more than a structure. It is a place, a personal sanctuary, where we can just be ourselves. We can cook, eat good food, watch whatever we want on TV, wear whatever clothing we want, make up is optional, hair does not need to be done, bra and shoes are definitely off, and we can just truly relax. In short, there are no social masks being worn here.
Maybe we have a dog or a cat. Maybe we live with a partner. Maybe we have kids. But our home is a place where we can just be.
Do you have that?
Maybe it’s not your dream home. Maybe it’s an apartment that is your first place out on your own. Or maybe you are renting a home that you’ve been in for quite some time.
You don’t have to own a structure for it to be considered your home.
Your home is where you make it.
So I ask you, are you happy at home?
Do you really need to work so much overtime? Will the promotion really bring you to a place of being happy at home? Will losing 5 pounds make you happy at home? Will buying new clothes, a great bag, or even a brand new Porsche make you happy at home?
Will any outside influence make you happy at home?
Maybe in the short term, but not for the long haul.
Now, I’m not telling you to go eat an entire bag of potato chips tonight. Or to break up with your boyfriend. Or quit your job.
What I am suggesting is that maybe, just maybe, you are already happy. That you don’t need to take on the world. That maybe you can intentionally enjoy yourself just for the sake of feeling happy.
Maybe we have created a bar so high (through social media comparisons) that we’ve lost sight of the simple things. The things that truly make us happy at home.
Maybe we’ve created a definition of happiness that isn’t real.
What if we are putting high expectations and stress on ourselves because we think we have to in order to be happy?
I’m a driven person. And I always have goals and a daily to-do list for myself. Because I enjoy that and I enjoy learning and getting better. I believe self growth is a major part of why we are here in the first place. So I’m not saying to become a couch potato and give up on your dreams.
What if you decided that you are happy right now? And that everything you do is just icing on the cake? No stress needed. What would that look like for you?
Would your life be easier? Simpler? More enjoyable?
Think about that today and this week. If you can shift your mindset to a place where you are already happy at home and everything you do is for learning, growth, or fun. Maybe you will find that your life is already full, your heart is whole and your life is pretty darn good.
I believe we all want to just feel better. Feel calm. Feel safe. Feel loved. Maybe we are already there.
You can Emerge Positive.
Positively,
deanne
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